Monthly Archives: February 2012

The Leaping Wiggly Wednesday

It’s Wiggly Wednesday!

Hey there folks, today is CMS’s second Wiggly Wednesday post. So I thought I’d let everyone know the reason for Wiggly Wednesdays has to do with my personal philosophy. I believe that wherever you are, whoever you are, and no matter what you are doing, you must always have some wiggle room. Life needs it, for the overworked person the reasons are obvious for why they’d want some wiggle room. But everyone needs it, the student who works everyday on any variety of things. The list that could potentially be made of all the things that anyone does is astronomical. (The list of excuses as to why people cannot allow themselves wiggle room is twice as long if not more-so.)

Don't wait

Every second is a chance to turn your life around there will never be a bad time to change things up and start incorporating those wiggle times.

I need wiggle room, and I create it! There are plenty of things that need my attention, as are there plenty of things that need your attention. We’ll never be able to do anything with our best potential if we can’t take a moment to relax.


This image here appears to not want to be linked, so feel free to check out our source here

The overall idea: Be happy, don’t restrict yourself to always working. Obviously you need to have priorities and know what to do and when to do it. But that doesn’t mean that you should let yourself work 24/7. Nobody is meant to live that way, you need to give yourself time to pamper yourself, or just do something silly that might be considered a waste of time. Live your life, do what you want to do just for you every once in awhile. It might feel strange for those of you that are particularly time strained workers. But everything in live improves with a bit of wiggle time. Just leap into it! Especially today, since it’s February 29th. You only get to leap in on this Wiggly Wednesday once in a very great while. In fact, the next leap year that will take place on a Wednesday will not be until 2040! =] So there’s a fun fact for you to enjoy on this, your Wiggly Wednesday.

Be kind, do something nice for a stranger today.

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Be Yourself: Knowing when it’s time

Hey there, welcome to Monday’s post. While I don’t plan on doing this often, we’re continuing the point from the last post on Saturday – Be Yourself: Acceptance. The overall idea is that you should always be yourself. No matter what you feel is against you, being who you really are is one of the most important things for you to do in order to keep yourself happy with yourself. Please see the previous post if you haven’t already. Feel free to share both of these as well!

Knowing When It’s Time

“Breathe. Let go. And remind yourself that this very moment is the only one you know you have for sure. ”
~Oprah Winfrey~

Thanks to Oprah for the quote, very smart lady she is. My philosophy on pretty much all life matters is fairly simple. Life is too short to waste time being someone you’re not. This applies to everything for me, and while I suggest this for everyone I’m aware that not everyone is prepared to do that. I’ve had plenty of rough patches in my life, to the point where I can fully understand that misery is comfortable. It’s hard to want to change once you’ve been in a bad place for so long. But it’s still something that you’ve gotta do. You can’t avoid that eventually you need to dig yourself out of the muck and see what the world has to offer. Change is new, change is unknown, change can be very scary. Knowing all of this is part of knowing when it’s time to change.

Knowing when it’s time. That being the whole reason for this post. How do you know when it’s time? What do you do when that time comes? You know it’s time when you look at this page. When you begin to wonder what you’re doing in your life. You know it’s time when you’re able to step outside of the box you’ve been trapped in.

There are millions of ways to help yourself be better, but they all need to start with the same foundation. You’ll never be able  to live happily, you’ll never be able to do anything you want in life unless you are, in the purest sense of the word, yourself.

That’s not to say that you can’t accomplish certain things when you are posing as another person. I’m sure you can. Anyone anywhere in the world can find successes if they look hard enough. But there is a key thing to note in a situation like this; you have to look for your successes. When you are being who you are, doing what wish to be doing, being who you wish to be with – when you live your life as you – you do not need to look for success.  You are success.

At the center of your being you have the answer; you know who you are and you know what you want.
~Lao Tzu~

There is, as always, a decent amount of explanation needed with all things to do with helping yourself. Before you can truly begin to change or “heal” yourself, you must always understand from where the problem originates. So, while it is in theory very simple to know when it is time to leave the shell that you’ve been allowing others to control, it’s not always as simple as it sounds. You know it’s time once you’ve made the conscious thought recognizing that you are not being the person that you know you are at your core. Below are a few instances that would highlight that you’re ready to leave behind someone else’s shadow and be your own person.

  • When your actions conflict with your thoughts
  • When you experience “Same Motions” boredom (If you’re being who you are and doing what you love, this won’t happen)
  • When you find yourself getting irritated with yourself
  • When you feel shame for who you see yourself as
  • When you’re not inspired to do anything in your life

If you ever have any of these thoughts, it’s time. There will of course be infinitely more, it’s up to you to recognize the difference of your situation to the general situations that I’m able to give here. Don’t let yourself stay trapped just because you don’t see your specific situation listed as an example. Stop for a moment and examine yourself. Are you who you want to be? Do you decide what you do in your life, or do you allow someone else to dictate what you do?

Yeah, there are some good reasons for me to move forward but…

  • “People won’t like me if I’m different.”
  • “I can’t afford the risk. Life isn’t good, but I can handle it.”
  • “My Significant Other won’t think of me the same.”
  • “Well, people don’t influence me that much…”
  • “I’m usually myself, I have to be someone else to get places.”
  • “Being like this is better than myself.”

These are EXCUSES, not reasons. Do not confuse them.

If a person is upset enough, their mind will turn on them in vicious ways to keep them down. You can be your own worst enemy if you make a point to be a strong person. You must have the courage to be yourself. When you can dismiss your own excuses for why you shouldn’t, that is when it’s time. Clear the obstacles that you create and you will be able to move forward.

When you’re able to put everything together – when you don’t have excuses, when you see that you’re not behaving like you feel you should, when you start to really think about where you are in life and how you’re not happy there – these are all very good signs that you are ready. You will always be your biggest opposition to self improvement. Overcome yourself and everything that comes after will be much easier.

Let me know what you do to recognize when you’re ready to truly be yourself and how you accept yourself. I’d love to hear from you and see what your friends feel about these posts. Share and share alike!

Be kind, do something nice for a stranger today.

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Be yourself: Acceptance

Hello there! I’d like to thank the wonderful Cadence Gamache for creating ComplicatedMadeSimple’s new header. Please let me know what you think of it below in the comments! 🙂

Today’s post will primarily focus on accepting who you are. Choosing to be yourself is a very large topic, and for that reason I’m going to break it up into a number of posts with a primary focus. As such, since accepting who you are is a sub topic for being yourself, there will be other sub topics mentioned today that I will not fully elaborate on until later. But rest assured! I will elaborate in the fullest detail that I am able.

Be Yourself

“Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.”

Thanks to Dr. Seuss for the quote.

Being yourself sounds rather simple, and while I wish it was it’s something so many of us lose in our day to day routines. It may be subtle at first, but before you can even begin to realize what’s happening, you’ve become someone else. Its easy to forget who you are if you’re not vigilant; as an example: it can be as simple as lighting a cigarette when you’re just the sort of person who wouldn’t smoke. No special reasons, its just not something you do. There are plenty of examples out there, feel free to think of one more personalized to you, I’m sure that there are many. Its as simple as choosing to wear formal attire when you simply don’t just to impress someone. It really can be anything at all, the first steps to losing yourself are always small, and almost always overlooked.

If you’ll indulge me, I’d like you to take a moment to look at your life for a moment now.

  • Do you find yourself doing things that you’re not entirely comfortable with? 
  • Do you try to impress people doing what you think they’d want?
  • Do you change your clothes from what you’d like to what you’re expected to wear?
  • Have you ever had to hold your tongue to keep from speaking your mind because you feel your words are undesired?
  • Do you frequently feel out of place, a person in a suit in a sea full of penguins?(Your colors are the same, but that’s where the similarities end.)

This list of questions could go on forever, feel free to ask yourself more your situation appropriate questions, these are just some examples to get the gears moving inside your mind.

The point of asking yourself these questions is so that you may identify your situation. It’s easy to overlook personal matters like this one. It’s not so much that we’re trained to lose ourselves as it is we’re trained to be obedient. This can have its uses, you can make a very good peon in the grand scheme of things, or if you break through the mold and keep yourself or find yourself again. You can live a very fulfilling life creating your own energy and being your own source of happiness. Pretty nice idea, right?

It certainly is!

Alright, I’ve identified that I am not behaving how I’d like to. I want to be me, but I’ve forgotten who I am. How do I find myself?

Assuming you’d ask yourself a question like the one above, then there are plenty of ways to find yourself once more. The first steps are ALWAYS the hardest. I promise you that! That’s not to say that the entire road may not be more difficult, but once you are past the first ones, the rest will fall into place.

An Example:  You have had a 50lb burden upon you your whole life, when you suddenly lift this burden you find yourself much lighter. The simple movement of walking may become too easy. It becomes very easy to stumble, fall, scrape yourself, and generally lose sight of where your feet are.

Be Yourself: Acceptance

You’ve probably realized by now whether or not you are yourself or just someone else’s idea of who you are. If you are yourself, then hurrah! I am happy for you, however if you’re not then good news is ahead for you! You can be yourself, and like everything worthwhile in life it takes effort.

You are who you are, you must be happy with yourself, and you cannot allow outside judgement to influence who you are. To do so means that you are being someone other than yourself. It’s not always a bad thing, and usually other people have only the best intentions with their judgments. But you must accept who you are, and be who you are.

Okay, thats simple enough. Be me, don’t be what other people tell me that I am. Be who I am as dictated by me. But I still don’t know who I am.

That’s totally okay! The world is filled with people trying to find themselves, and it may take you awhile to truly find out who you are. But in trying to find yourself, you are going to be yourself for the duration and you will become your own person. Being yourself is as simple as it is complicated. There are entire books dedicated to being yourself, it is a great topic to fully explore, and I urge you to do so if you’re the sort that enjoys to read. I’ve always enjoyed it myself.

In the end however, it comes down to this: You must be able to accept who you are. It’s a respectable quality. The person who is always nice, accepts that they are a very nice person. It will have drawbacks, they may be “walked all over”. People may abuse the kindness that is given, but depending on the person, they know that will happen and they accept that their person is a very kind if not too kind person. It will happen.

The person who is opposite of this is true as well, if you are a person who is filled only with mean and negative thoughts. It will show, you will be a very mean person no doubt. And people will not like you because of it, and that is okay if that is who you are. You are exactly who you are, and there is no other person you should be than you. The mean person will accept that people will not like them, and they will still be the same mean person that they are. This person will not be shaken by people disliking them.

Being who you are is tricky, you must be steadfast in your beliefs. You must know your beliefs, you must know what type of person you are in your core. When it comes to the thick of it, you have always been who you are at your core, all you need to do is sync up your core with your exterior. Those close to you know your core, those less so only know your exterior. When these two things match up, the unintentional secrets you have will cease to exist. Your life will become less burdened, and overall, you’ll become a much happier person.

Its a terrible feeling to feel as though you don’t belong, its even worse to feel that you must hide who you are to belong anywhere. When you accept, and embrace who you are.

*Core person: The person you are deep inside, there may be many layers that you show the world, you may react differently on a situation to situation basis. But deep down, this is the type of person you are. Through it all, in the very best and very worst situations, this factor does not change. Most people have developed their “Core” responses by the time they’re 10 I’ve found. To date, if you know a person well enough, you most likely know their “Core” person even if they themselves do not. Query: Do you know your Core self? Or someone else’s? Let me and the readers know in the comments below.

When you take a moment to evaluate yourself, your life, your level of contentment, you know fairly quickly if you are doing, if you are being, if you’re behaving, and overall if you are living the life you want to live. Don’t be afraid of the unknown, don’t be afraid to lose those that don’t matter. Life always finds a way of sorting itself out if you put in the effort.

The next post will continue Be Yourself: Knowing when its time.

Be kind, do something nice for a stranger today.

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Wiggly Wednesday

I thought I’d make Wednesday’s a bit more relaxed.

Life is full of surprises, with many of those surprises we are lucky enough to learn how to improve ourselves. I love to be able to bring what I learn to the attention of others so that they too may benefit from what I’ve learned. But, like everything in life, we can’t spend every moment doing the same thing, and I wouldn’t want to subject you, my readers to that every few days. =] So here’s to you! Enjoy a fun project or two, give yourself some time to wiggle with your children, family, friends. Be silly, it’s good for the soul. Do a fun project you’ve been putting off. No more waiting for life my friends!

Reclaimed Wood Bench eclectic entry
Everyone at some point or another has scrap, others throw it out faster than others, or donate it or dispose of it in some fashion. But plenty of folks in the world also love to let it accumulate. Through my Houzz updates that I recieve I was just notified of this amazing little project that Erin Lang Norris undertook. She made this delightful bench to solve two problems she’d been having. I’d highly suggest checking out their latest post if home projects are something you enjoy.
The photo is linked and clicking it will take you directly to her post. Have fun!
Our second project for this post is one that I think is outstanding, and one I completely plan on doing. Most people enjoy organization, even if they don’t necessarily enjoy creating it. Its nice to know exactly where everything is, and for that matter to actually know what you have. If you’re someone who enjoys to cook, or just have a lot of spices in general. I’d have to highly recommend that you visit the below linked picture and check out just how the author Jen went about making this. Its worth the read without question.
Magnetic Cabinets!
 It may look complicated, it may seem daunting. But just take a look, this is complicated made simple at its best. A seemingly difficult task has never been so easy.
Be kind, do something nice for a stranger Anyone today.
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Keep Moving Forward

Here’s a short story to highlight what  I spoke  about in my previous post

My name is Derek, I come from the land of nowhere and everywhere. I have a small family of four, they’re great and they’re awful. Truth be told, there isn’t any other family I’d rather have. In the same moment that I couldn’t be happier with them, I couldn’t be more frustrated. I work at LS Factory, its about five blocks from my house on the direct route, and about seven if I lollygag and take a longer walk for the fresh air. I leave to work at five in the morning and I get back around five or six in the evening. Whenever I go to work I get the dreaded feeling of nothingness, and whenever I walk home I feel the urge to try something new and just go for it despite my worries! But, I’m just Derek. A 25 year old guy, this is my future. At least, that’s what I thought until as I was walking home, on a Wednesday evening for the facts, I had a bit of a revelation you could say.

Derek being entirely fictional, has what many would consider to be a typical lifestyle, and a typical day. Financially he needs for little but has much for want. Truly, someone other than Derek could be very happy. But, that is not the life that Derek had wanted. I’m sure so many of you are also finding yourselves in the repetitive motions from which you desperately want to move forward. But right now you’re stagnant, staying still in the same motion day in and day out. Does this sound something like your day to day?

Many of us certainly wish to get to our dream jobs, live in our dream locations, and just keep moving forward. But for whatever reasons, the majority of us stop moving when we get to what we feel is a safe place in our lives.

You need to question if you are happy with where you are  in your life right now. Are you employed unhappily? Are you unemployed? Are you a parent who wishes to get more out of  life? There are a great many questions to be asked, and they must be asked before a problem can be resolved. After all, how can you hope to fix a problem you don’t know exists? The answer is that you cannot. Thankfully, these sorts of problems aren’t hard to spot once you tune into yourself for a moment.  So, before we proceed further, I’d like you to ponder a few questions.

  • Do you live where you want to live?
  • Do you have a career or a job that you love?
  • Are you happy with your home’s decorations?
  • Are you happy with how you  feel physically?
  • Do you find yourself wanting but not letting yourself want?
  • Do you ever tell yourself that you “Can’t” or “Won’t ever”
  • When is the last time you just watched the sunset/sunrise? Can you remember?

Nothing in your life is wrong, always remember that. You are in charge of the direction you go, you choose where you live, and you choose how to respond to the situations that arise in your life. Everything is your responsibility in your life. This is the same rule that I’ve lived by for quite some time, and once I started living my life with everything being my responsibility, my quality of life improved.

*To clarify: Everything in my life is my responsibility, but that does not mean that I micro-manage everything in my life. It means that at all times, I am able to respond to the goings on of my life. I may not respond perfectly, but I am always prepared to respond to a changing situation in my life because it is my responsibility to do so. The course of my life is dictated by me for better or worse entirely. 100%. As long as you accept that, your life will always be for the better. 

Once you’ve decided to fully accept responsibility for your life and where you are, you’ll be able to move forward. You’ve by now taken a moment to check where you are in life. If you’re happy where you are, then I am very happy for you!  But if you’re not happy, or if you’re happy but not where you’d like to be in life, then you know its time to move forward.

To move forward, one must simply take the first step. It’s always the hardest. It’s hard to leave the life to which you’ve grown accustomed even if you’re unhappy with it. It’s difficult to start looking for your dream job. However, life has a way of testing us to make sure that we’re ready. The harder it is, the better the payoff will be.

You’re always going to be your biggest opposition. Nobody else can slow you down once you get started with your dream. Assuming you and I have this in common, you’ve given yourself a plethora of excuses as to why you shouldn’t upset your established order, and why you shouldn’t go after your dream. If you want to move forward with your life and keep striving towards what makes you happiest in life, then its time to do away with those excuses. They’re not helping anyone. If you have a husband/wife/children they’ll support you. Financially, things are always more difficult during change. But change is a beautiful thing. Without change we’d never find out so many of the great things in life that we love. I was able to meet my amazing fiancee because of a series of life changes that both of us went through. Being afraid of the unknown is totally normal, but you should never let your fears cripple you. You are in control of your life, you control how your fears affect you, you control the course of your life. You are outstanding! Don’t forget that.

So, the best advice I can give you today for this?

Go out and realize your dreams.

You will be great at what you love to do, the road to get to where you want to be may be difficult, but don’t lose faith in yourself. While you can be your own worst enemy, you are also your greatest ally. You know what you want, you know how much you want it, and you know what will make you happy. We live in a world where our greatest restriction is our own mind, let yourself free of those shackles and go for what you want. You’ll have to fully dedicate yourself to whats really important to you as you do this though.

Success has Costs

You’ll be successful the more you press for your dreams, and the harder you try the better you’ll be. And the more successful you get, the more likely it is that you’ll meet resistance from people you knew as friends. Don’t take this personally. More often than not when someone is overly critical or tries to make you feel bad for your success they are just upset about where they are. They haven’t taken the steps to move forward in their own lives. You may lose friends as you become more successful, it happens. But you’ll keep the real friends you have, and you’ll most likely gain new friends related to your field.

Keep in mind whats going to change before you make drastic changes in your life, discuss it with your family. Its unlikely that people won’t support you, but it makes it easier for people to support you if they know what you’re trying to accomplish. They know and love you, they have faith that you’ll be great at your passion.

I went home that evening and spoke with my family. I told them that I couldn’t be happy if I lived the rest of my life working at the factory, I knew that working there was safe for the right now, and that it brought in enough money to help us survive. But it was leaving me empty inside. After explaining with my family for awhile how working there was taking its toll on me, they seemed to understand. But they were hesitant about my plans for the future. I told them how it was my dream to build the new skyscrapers and to design buildings. I’d always dreamed of being an architect, and that I was going to give it my all to get the appropriate degrees and start a new career. Better now than later. I’d try to keep my job at the factory with reduced hours to keep an income while I went to school. My family supported me and they were very happy that I was pursuing what makes me happy. I was nervous that my family wouldn’t support me, but my family wants me to be happy and they’ll support me through thick and thin. I feel as though the air I breathe is cleaner now that I’m moving towards my career goal.

Be kind, do something nice for a stranger today.

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